Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 20-25 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Survived Saturday.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Survived Friday.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Made a very long killing spree.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Survived Thursday.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Survived Wednesday.
Survived Tuesday.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Sucked down your own piss.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Gained your first dog helper.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Survived Monday.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Kicked open a door.
Totaled 30 cars.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Read the newspaper every day.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Wore all three outfits.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Rescued your loyal companion.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old friend.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.