Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 20-25 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Read the newspaper every day.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Totaled 30 cars.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Survived Saturday.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Made a very long killing spree.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Survived Friday.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Survived Thursday.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Survived Wednesday.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Wore all three outfits.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Gained your first dog helper.
Survived Tuesday.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Kicked open a door.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Sucked down your own piss.
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Reunited with an old friend.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.