Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 20-25 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Survived Friday.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Read the newspaper every day.
Survived Thursday.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Survived Wednesday.
Survived Tuesday.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Gained your first dog helper.
Survived Monday.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Kicked open a door.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Sucked down your own piss.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Survived Saturday.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Totaled 30 cars.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Wore all three outfits.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Made a very long killing spree.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Finished all seven days.
Reunited with an old friend.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.