Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 20-25 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Made a very long killing spree.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Read the newspaper every day.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Survived Saturday.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Survived Friday.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Totaled 30 cars.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Wore all three outfits.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Kicked open a door.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Survived Thursday.
Gained your first dog helper.
Sucked down your own piss.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Survived Wednesday.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Survived Tuesday.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Survived Monday.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Reunited with an old flame.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old friend.