Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 20-25 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Finished all seven days.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Survived Saturday.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Wore all three outfits.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Read the newspaper every day.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Made a very long killing spree.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Survived Friday.
Survived Thursday.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Survived Wednesday.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Sucked down your own piss.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Totaled 30 cars.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Survived Tuesday.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Survived Monday.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Gained your first dog helper.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Kicked open a door.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Reunited with an old flame.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Reunited with an old friend.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)