Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 30-35 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Survived Friday.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Read the newspaper every day.
Survived Thursday.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Totaled 30 cars.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Survived Wednesday.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Survived Tuesday.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Kicked open a door.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Sucked down your own piss.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Gained your first dog helper.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Survived Saturday.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Wore all three outfits.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Made a very long killing spree.
Finished all seven days.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Reunited with an old friend.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.