Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 20-25 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Survived Saturday.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Survived Friday.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Survived Thursday.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Totaled 30 cars.
Survived Wednesday.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Gained your first dog helper.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Survived Tuesday.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Kicked open a door.
Sucked down your own piss.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Read the newspaper every day.
Wore all three outfits.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Made a very long killing spree.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Reunited with an old friend.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.