Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 20-25 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Totaled 30 cars.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Survived Saturday.
Survived Friday.
Read the newspaper every day.
Survived Thursday.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Survived Wednesday.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Wore all three outfits.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Survived Tuesday.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Sucked down your own piss.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Gained your first dog helper.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Kicked open a door.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Made a very long killing spree.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Reunited with an old friend.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.