Here is the full list of all 24 Jazzpunk: Director's Cut achievements. It takes around 2-3 hours to unlock all of the achievements on Windows.
Scratch 2 compact discs in the bachelor pad
Visit all travel destinations in the world
Collect all 8 spiders in the restaurant
Land awkwardly while diving at the pool
Dial all phone menu options
Assist a saliva deficient individual by fulfilling their stationary needs
Degauss 4 undercover agents in the park
Talk to 3 inanimate cardboard boxes
Dial various four letter words into the Nippon Telnet phone terminal
Consume vast quantities of jelly to fulfill ethical responsibilities
Serve a bloody mary
Get kissed by an unhygienic individual on two separate occasions
Find and utilize a bidet
Win a round of pillow fight
Discovered all of the artifacts buried in sand
Rescue the drowning man in the swimming pool
Kiss 3 people while wearing lipstick
Apply lipstick VERY generously to your face
Explore other guest rooms at the resort
Consume one brain steeped sandwich
Shatter all vases in the shop
Smuggle a carrier pigeon into the next level
Defeat a microscopic squadron of bacteriophage
Spray 3 people with pheromones