Here is the full list of all 28 Genital Jousting achievements.
Swallow every worm.
Don't let sleeping dongs lie.
Use all the "supplements" you can for maximal gains.
You should see a doctor immediately.
Eat a disgusting amount of popcorn.
Reminisce about your care-free days as a cactus picker.
Submit your monthly physical report.
Learn how to literally just navigate the main menu.
Marry yourself in Abstinence.
Collect enough milk to fill the tank.
Everyone survives having sex in a trash-compactor full of needles.
Get all of the rings in Lord of the Rings.
Be the only one locked out of an ouroborus.
Win Lights Out in under five seconds.
Good at video games. Terrible at sex.
Finish last in a Party Mode game.
Have sex in the Date Night graveyard.
Save yourself for that special orgy.
Have enough friends and enough controllers to play an 8 player game.
Penetrate yourself in Traditional Mode.
Start taking responsibility for you actions.
Make peace with a gaggle of swans. Their natural instinct is to kill.
Die a lot of times in your nightmares.
Use the cake knife to defend yourself from wedding guests.
Penetrate God.
Safely deploy all the fire extinguishers. For safety.
Move to the right.
Move to the left.