Genital Jousting Achievements Here is the full list of all 28 Genital Jousting achievements.Filter Achievement View View Image viewList view Sort by TrueSteamAchievement desc TrueSteamAchievement asc Achievement name desc Achievement name asc TSA Ratio desc TSA Ratio asc Gamers desc Gamers asc Steam order Date won desc Date won asc What are achievement flags? Click to find outApply Most Improved TapulatorLearn how to literally just navigate the main menu. Go LeftMove to the left. Go RightMove to the right. Meet Your MakerPenetrate God. Summer JobReminisce about your care-free days as a cactus picker. Fire InspectorSafely deploy all the fire extinguishers. For safety. Early BirdSwallow every worm. Sleep No MoreDon't let sleeping dongs lie. Self DefenceUse the cake knife to defend yourself from wedding guests. Swan TamerMake peace with a gaggle of swans. Their natural instinct is to kill. Bulking GearUse all the "supplements" you can for maximal gains. PaperworkSubmit your monthly physical report. Popcorn BuffetEat a disgusting amount of popcorn. Appalling AppetiteYou should see a doctor immediately. ClumsyDie a lot of times in your nightmares. A Better JohnStart taking responsibility for you actions. Master UnlockerCollect enough milk to fill the tank. Couch PartyHave enough friends and enough controllers to play an 8 player game. Always Finishes FirstGood at video games. Terrible at sex. Generous LoverFinish last in a Party Mode game. Spare WheelBe the only one locked out of an ouroborus. The Perfect PartnerMarry yourself in Abstinence. My PreciousGet all of the rings in Lord of the Rings. Magnetic BassholeWin Lights Out in under five seconds. Safety FirstEveryone survives having sex in a trash-compactor full of needles. Till Death Do UsHave sex in the Date Night graveyard. AutopaedicatioPenetrate yourself in Traditional Mode. Fussy LoverSave yourself for that special orgy.