Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 30-35 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Totaled 30 cars.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Finished all seven days.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Survived Saturday.
Survived Friday.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Survived Thursday.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Survived Wednesday.
Wore all three outfits.
Survived Tuesday.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Gained your first dog helper.
Sucked down your own piss.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Kicked open a door.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Read the newspaper every day.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Made a very long killing spree.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Reunited with an old friend.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.