Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 30-35 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Read the newspaper every day.
Wore all three outfits.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Made a very long killing spree.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Finished all seven days.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Survived Saturday.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Totaled 30 cars.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Sucked down your own piss.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Survived Friday.
Survived Thursday.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Gained your first dog helper.
Survived Wednesday.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Kicked open a door.
Survived Tuesday.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Reunited with an old flame.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Reunited with an old friend.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.