Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 30-35 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Survived Friday.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Survived Thursday.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Survived Wednesday.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Wore all three outfits.
Survived Tuesday.
Totaled 30 cars.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Sucked down your own piss.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Gained your first dog helper.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Kicked open a door.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Survived Saturday.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Read the newspaper every day.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Made a very long killing spree.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Finished all seven days.
Reunited with an old friend.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.