Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 30-35 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Finished all seven days.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Survived Friday.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Kicked 30 dogs.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Read the newspaper every day.
Survived Thursday.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Survived Saturday.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Wore all three outfits.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Survived Wednesday.
Survived Tuesday.
Totaled 30 cars.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Kicked open a door.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Gained your first dog helper.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Sucked down your own piss.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Made a very long killing spree.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Reunited with an old friend.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.