Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 30-35 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Totaled 30 cars.
Sucked down your own piss.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Gained your first dog helper.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Survived Saturday.
Survived Friday.
Read the newspaper every day.
Survived Thursday.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Wore all three outfits.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Survived Wednesday.
Made a very long killing spree.
Survived Tuesday.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Kicked open a door.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old friend.