Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 30-35 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Totaled 30 cars.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Survived Saturday.
Made a very long killing spree.
Killed over 1,000 people.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Survived Friday.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Read the newspaper every day.
Survived Thursday.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Survived Wednesday.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Wore all three outfits.
Survived Tuesday.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Gained your first dog helper.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Sucked down your own piss.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Kicked open a door.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Reunited with an old flame.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.
Reunited with an old friend.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Rescued your loyal companion.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.