Full list of all 89 POSTAL 2 achievements. It takes around 30-35 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game on Windows.
The base game contains 69 achievements, and there is 1 DLC pack containing 20 achievements.
Put out someone that's on fire.
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Totaled 30 cars.
Sucked down your own piss.
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Saved the marching band from explody death.
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Finished all seven days.
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Killed over 1,000 people.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Survived Saturday.
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Survived Friday.
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Gained your first dog helper.
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Read the newspaper every day.
Survived Thursday.
Wore all three outfits.
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Survived Wednesday.
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Survived Tuesday.
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Survived Monday.
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Kicked open a door.
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Kicked 30 dogs.
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Made a very long killing spree.
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Rescued your loyal companion.
Spent $5,000 on vending machines.
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Reunited with an old flame.
Reunited with an old enemy.
Reunited with an old friend.
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Kicked 30 people in the balls.